Dilbert's Words of Wisdom

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom

- I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good, either.
- I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
- I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.
- Tell me what you need and I'll tell you how to get along without it.
- I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
- On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the Escape key.
- I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier.
- Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level.
- Don't be irreplaceable --> if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

- After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before.

- You are always doing something marginal when the boss drops by your desk.

- If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.

- When you don't know what to do, walk fast, carry a clipboard, and look worried.

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